Skip to main content

A Surgery Date...Finally!!!!


 💯Man, this is so crazy yo!!💯  I've been waiting for this date for over a year.  November 3, 2020, will be like a rebirth for me physically.  Like, I am actually excited, nervous, anxious, etc.  I mean this is one of the biggest surgeries I have ever had.  I mean the mastectomy was a huge deal, but this is Breast DIEP Flap surgery; DIEP stands for Deep Inferior Epigastric Perforator.  With the DIEP Flap surgery the lower abdominal skin and fat is removed without having to harvest any of the rectus abdominis muscle.  Then, with the skin and fat from my stomach the plastic surgeons will reconstruct me a new breast, and perform a lift on the other breast to make them even.  Oh and I will be having my stomach muscles tightened up and hernia removed as well.  I won't have a bellybutton, but my plastic surgeon says he can make me a pretty one a later date!!!  

I can't lie ya girl is LIT ASF about getting this surgery done, but more than anything I get to get this expander out and this pain will be gone.  I stay in pain daily & Yes it sucks!! But, due to the nerve damage to my left arm I can't feel when it hurts at that particular point in time.  I only notice when it's a sharp ass pain outta nowhere.  I think I might be in a bit of shock and denial about it because; I guess I never thought it would be happening as quick as it is.  I know that I am grateful and blessed that they are doing everything at the same time. 

So, it's Sunday night and I take a COVID test in the morning in preparation for my surgery on Tuesday.  I'm feeling very anxious, nervous, scared, shooketh, etc. I know the jitters would come, but this is different because this is my life & body being transformed in a way I didn't ask for, but it's the reward I deserve after what my body endured. I don't care who doesn't like it; all I know is that if anybody says I had a boob job please believe you will get all the business of these words and education about why I had to lose 1 of my breast in the 1st place.

✨My Warrior Scars are Beautiful✨ 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Red Dragon

So, I'm on my new chemo medicine,  and it is a beast...we call it the "red dragon". We call it that because it is blood red, and the side effects are a damn beast🐉 This medication keeps me nauseous, and has dramatically changed my skin. I literally have bumps all over my face, in my ears, in my brows, and on my head. And, they hurt like the dickens. When I look in the mirror it makes me wanna cry... which I'm sure is coming soon. Like, my face has changed dramatically and I can't even wear makeup anymore. My skin is so sensitive to every little thing. All of this happening makes me realize mentally that my beauty is deeper within. I realized that I was still partially hiding behind my makeup because I didn't feel as beautiful as I thought. You know what days that I know I'm beautiful...chemo days. Because I genuinely take my time, and get myself ready makeup and all. Now this week will be my first week not wearing makeup to chemo because my skin is too ...

Mode

So, I've had my mastectomy, my draims removed (scars from my drains), and now I'm getting expanded for my reconstructive surgery.  You see things have changed, but I'm still gonna keep it pushing. I'm moving into Goddess from Queen level up mode. This mode requires me to protect me and my energy at all times. You see I know that their is one waiting for the worse, but I'm the one that just hurt your feelings. You see, I'm going to always be A muthafukin' 1 ya dig!!! This cancer did it's thang to me physically, mentally, and emotionally I can't lie about that, but now I'm in control like my girl Janet said. I don't care if you think I'm ugly or bald headed because I'm still cute with dimples and the hips of a Goddess in the words of Trina...I'm the baddest. So, many have worried about all the wrong ish, and it's ok. Because you can't understand what you haven't and hopefully won't ever have to go thru with this ...

After Effects of Chemo

You never know how things will effect you until a couple days later. Chemo whoops my a$! every other week for at least a week. The nerve pain is indescribable!!  It's like thousands of electric shocks 24/7! I can't grip things, open my medications, or actually type on my phone; I have to use my stylus. Then, the feet, Lawd Hammercy!! They stay puffy, swollen, and sometimes hurt when I put shoes on. Next, the nausea & not being able to taste food, drink, anything🤦🏾‍♀️where do I begin!! It sucks!! Finally, the body as a whole is just defeated. My bones and joints hurt like I have a undiscovered flu strain!! That's the best way to describe it. My body hurts like I have the flu to the 125th power😔 It just takes a toll on my spirit & heart ya know. There aren't any days where you feel like your old self. Like NONE😔  There are only a few days (maybe 4) that I will feel like going places, but then it's time for chemo again. CHEMO😡🤬!! It's hard but it...